Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessle

So the novel is brilliant, rubbish or what?

This famous Sufi story sums up the conflict around Marisha Pessl début novel "Special Topics in Calamity Physics":

A judge in a village court had gone on vacation. Nasrudin was asked to be temporary judge for a day. Nasrudin sat on the Judge's chair with a serious face, gazing around the public and ordered the first case be brought-up for hearing.

"You are right," said Nasrudin after hearing one side.

"You are right," he said after hearing the other side.

"But both cannot be right," said a member of public sitting in the audience.

"You are right, too" said Nasrudin.

So is it juvenile rubbish written by a writer who has… a tin ear for prose. There is a page-by-page cascade of dreadful extended metaphors and distractingly inappropriate similes. Or is it the…most flashily erudite first novel since Jonathan Safran Foer’s Everything Is Illuminated. With its pirouettes and cartwheels, its tireless annotations and digressions, it has a similar whiz-kid eagerness to wow the reader.

Plot, Genre and what the F**k is going on

To see which way I sit, let’s start with Plot. The novel is mainly about the senior year of Blue Van Meer at a yuppie private school where her Father teaches political science. She is very bright and heading for being the top of the year on her way to Harvard. Hannah a film professor who bewitches the clever/social elite of the college befriends Blue. They are bitterly opposed to Blue’s presence and this is made plain in her treatment over the year but she is attracted to one of the pack and perhaps its mutual.

And there was Milton, sturdy and grim with a big, cushiony body like someone’s favorite reading chair in need of reupholstering…He was eighteen but looked thirty. His face , cluttered with brown eyes, curly black hair, a swollen mouth, had a curdled handsomeness to it, as if, incredibly, it wasn’t what it’d once been.

But another loves her and she can’t see past him being a jock and nice guy. So here we have the elements for High School satire.

But she and her Father have been on the road, teaching at colleagues and attending schools around America since her mother died when she was five. So part of the energy of the book is the hilarious scatter-gun comedy of them both on the road and the Father’s I-am-so-right about all things views on all things

“Everyone is responsible for the page-turning tempo of his or her Life Story,” Dad said, scratching his jaw thoughtfully, arranging the limp collar of his chambray shirt. “Even if you have your Magnificent Reason, it could still be as dull as Nebraska and that’s no one’s fault but your own. Well, if you feel it’s miles of cornfields, find something to believe in other that yourself, preferably a cause without the stench of hypocrisy, and then charge in to battle…

Combine the High School satire and the need to assess her Father and we have a Coming of Age as the story is written a year after as the Narrator (Blue) reviews the events of the past year and what her future will be. Those readers not comfortable with mixed genres also have to contend with the fact that the novel is also a Mystery. Its stated in the first few pages that Hannah dies, how and under what circumstances is revealed as the story unfolds. After the death about 2/3rds into the story takes an unexpected turn as it shows that, none of the events and main character were, as they seemed.

Does the genre mix work? Yes for me, as I liked the way that each of the genres undermine and reinvigorate each other. It’s like watching a film that combines “Heathers”(High School satire) “The Crying Game” (political intrigue) and “American Graffiti” ( growing up), which would be a mess in the wrong hands. But having a single narrator with Blue’s personality keeps this from unravelling but it may not be for you. As this commenter makes clear... A fizzy fusion of prep-school escapade, Gothic murder mystery and revolutionary intrigue (...) Initially entertaining, such gimmickry swiftly becomes tiresome and, rather than adding depth, detracts from a plot

Structure and Voice reflecting story purpose and shape

The structure of the novel reflects the over earnest academic nature of the narrator and her teenage angst in that its structured around core curriculum reading which means that each chapter is linked to famous, novel, play, political essay or poem such as Moby-Dick, Laughter in the Dark, Othello. Part of the humour of the novel is see what the possible resonance of the quoted title is with the actual events in the chapter. The end chapter, Final Exam sums up the book’s themes in a series of multi-choice questions and should not be read until the end of the book! The introduction like any introduction sets out what is to be discussed and for those that read it after finishing the novel it does but you miss it the first time round!

The narrator is a hot-house intellectual cultivated by her father and never really having the opportunities to have child-child friendships. This is shown in the novel by her excessive quote of references (not real life ones-give an author a break) and of quoting her father (these have the impact of being a commentary on the characters actions and showing her naïveté).This passage describes the silence used by Hannah.

And the wasn’t premeditated, condescending, or forced (see chapter9, “ Get Your Teen to Consider You thee ‘In’ Crowd.” Befriending Your Kids, Howards, 2000)

Obviously being able to simply was a skill supremely underestimated in the Western world. As Dad was found of saying all Winners were in possession of a strident voice, which was successfully producing a country that was insanely loud, so, loud most of the time, no actual meaning could be discerned-‘only nationwide white noise.’

Writing and characterisation: Good or Bad

Well I was carried along by writing tricks of the trade such as the the rich wordplay in which the character gets complexly carried away with metaphors and similes so whole passages come alive with the joy of language.

I had not foreseen the stiff , clapboard manner with which she’d greeted me, the barebones welcome, the whisper of a frown-as if I ‘d been wired for sound all night…


On Friday, March 26th, with the same innocence of the Trojans as they gathered around the strange wooden horse standing at the gate to their city in order to marvel at its craftsmanship, Hannah drove our yellow Rent-me truck into the dirt lot of Sunset Views Encampment and parked in Space 52.

Or as one critic put it...(H)er mesmeric tale, even at its most over-the-top, feels true to the operatic agonies of adolescence.

The three main characters, Blue, her father (Her father in many ways dominates as a character and it will be wonderful to see how they play him in the film surely under discussion) and Hannah stand out and several of the minor characters as well especially the “June Bugs” Blue and her fathers description of the women who get drawn in and dumped when they stop being amusing. The possible weakness is the Bluebloods, the college elite, it is not always clear why they act the way they act. In part this is the muddled perception of Blue and the manipulations Hannah. But they do tend to be used as plot devices and foils for some of the satire rather then being independent characters in their own right. Some concern has been expressed that Blue is not convincing: an intellectual that doesn’t read, getting to the top of the class based on intellectual efforts only etc but lighten up, it’s a satire not an anthropological study.

So what’s the judgement?

So, if you read it, get driven by the energy of the writing to the end and be amazed how much you have been tricked about what was really going on. Enjoy the characters and social satire. It is an impressive debut novel that is fun and funny but it bears no relationship with "The Secret History" by Donna Tartt so ignore that red herring. And ignore comments like...Her exhilarating synthesis of the classic and the modern, frivolity and fate -- Pnin meets The O.C. -- is a poetic act of will. Its good but please it ain’t the second coming or one night alone with your secret desire- you know who I mean.

Oh and of course you too are right.

Beware of God by Shalom Auslander

The rabbi was fed up with his congregation. So, he decided to skip the services on Yom Kippur, the holiest day on the Jewish calendar, and instead go play golf. Moses was looking down from heaven and saw the rabbi on the golf course. He naturally reported it to God. Moses suggested God punish the rabbi severely. As he watched, Moses saw the rabbi playing the best game he had ever played! The rabbi got a hole-in-one on the toughest hole on the course. Moses turned to God and asked, "I thought you were going to punish him. Do you call this punishment?!" God replied, "Who can he tell?"

Offended? Puzzled? Then best not to read the rest of this review as Beware of God by Shalom Auslander, a compilation of his short stories, moves you into dark, poignant, bittersweet, mocking stories where God has to kill you in order to keep the books straight, or monkeys suffer suicidal consciousness. In “God is a big Chicken” that what God is and Yankel Morgenstern back from the dead has to tell the truth or live the lie. “Holocaust for the Kids” is a montage of apparent quotes and facts and family comments that show up the horror of the Holocaust.

Some of the common themes are animals with human awareness, God dealing with human dilemmas, humans not understanding how God works (the near death experience is not God saving you but God’s aim being off that day), families struggling and relationships failing. Many of his stories are coloured by his upbringing in a narrow Judaism. As Shalom Auslander says about his highly acclaimed memoir Foreskin Lament, (which if you want to pass my way please feel free).

I was raised in a small ultra-Orthodox Jewish community in New York; picture a madrasa somewhere in Taliban Town, change the head coverings to yarmulkes, switch the Korans for Old Testaments and that’s pretty much it. The book is about my life under the thumb of an abusive, belligerent God, and the long-term emotionally crippling effects the fundamentalism of my youth has had and continues to have upon me. But funny. I suppose it didn’t help that my father on Earth was as abusive as my Father in Heaven. Good times, good times.

Its this self-depreciating, prick pomposity humour that drives these well written stories. Unlike many collections, this has diversity and surprise so it avoids the sameness of style or theme that weakens so many other collections. This is down to the quality and cadence of the writing as well as its humour as in this story when God goes to an Ad Agency.

They did concept testing of a number of preliminary taglines and position statements. Nobody in the focus groups like “The Original and Still the Best”, they were spilt on “The Porsche of Deities” and “Feeling Odd? Try God” met with consistent disapproval. One elderly woman took personal offence with the latter, as she understood the tagline to be suggesting that if she believed in God, she must be odd; a meaningful discussion nearly ensure, and an emergency plate of doughnuts was hurried in.

Highly recommended, oh and readers in the UK could rush down to their local Works as the HB is on sale for only 99p. Let me leave the last word to Shalom.

For general contact, comments, questions, requests, accusations, rants and tirades, email: Jackie@shalomauslander.com Please note that while I try to read all emails, I am quite busy with writing, whining, self-loathing, reading glowing reviews of the work of people other then me, complaining to my shrink, masturbating and intoxicating myself to be able to respond to every one, but I do appreciate them. The positive ones, anyway.

An Utterly Impartial History of Britain: (or 2000 Years of Upper Class Idiots in Charge) by John O’Farrell

You have a spare summer and fancy writing a book but can’t be bothered with all that creative muse malarky. It’s a bit too soon for the autobiography( still working on doing the X-factor and the Big Brother application and frankly not so hot on the sports front) so what do you do? Well you pop along to the local reference library and sort out a stack of What the Roman’s did for us, Great Kings and Queens of England, Prime Minsters I have known, and write a comic History of Britain for History refusniks. This is what John O’Farrell attempts to do in An Utterly Impartial History of Britain: (or 2000 Years of Upper Class Idiots in Charge). As you failed English know ( for Americans and other ex colonial types, local joke so ignore) when we mention Britain we really mean England except if one of you win an Olympic medal so you still have time to fit in one for Scotland, Wales or Ireland.

The question is, does it work as comedy, history or even comedic history? The gold standard is 1066 and All That and frankly, the book struggles in comparison. Both draw on popular memories of what is history and make it the raw material for humour. The historical factoids of the O’Farrell book do make it ideal for a bathroom read as you can dip in and out as nature calls. But the John O’Farrell humour of Blackadderish quips and asides* can grate unlike1066 and All That.**

Well does it work as History? Er…not really. If you had more interesting things to do at school, it does give you a simple overview of English History. If you paid attention then the lack of accuracy (Read the Terry Deary Horrid History series to see how its done properly) or the one-dimensional nature of the account soon irritates. One particular annoying clanger is the myth that the Anglo-Saxons wiped out the Romano-Celtic language and culture. The 0rigins of the British by Stephen Oppenheimer based on genetic evidence show that the SW and Wales, Southern England and the North had separate and long-standing separate waves of settlement. Meaning that the natives that the Romans met in the south were of Germanic origin and hence why so little Celtic influence in place names and English. I could go about his slighting reference to the King James Bible (an attempt to head off the radical puritans translations), his failure to address the social-religious movements of the English Civil War and their impact and don’t get me started on his nonsense of the first World War. Yes, I did pay attention in History and so what if you were more popular in school.

So any redeeming features? It does have several serious asides about the lack of social justice; we the working people rarely get a look in on political and social power until perhaps the English Civil war and then struggled to get universal franchise until 1948(when students having two votes was abolished). But, this was done much better by the classic Making of the English Working Class by E.P. Thompson.

If you do get hold of a copy, pass it on to your teenagers who might at last get a sense what Sir was droning on about. As for you, its raining so get down and write the history that John O’Farrell didn’t write. As for you few Americans still here, read about your own forgotten past in A People's History of the United States: 1492 to Present by Howard Zinn.

Remembering that humour is subjective here are other viewpoints:

* Well researched, very funny book, which was a joy as holiday reading. Frequently laugh-out-loud. Highly enjoyable.

** a book full of silly upper-class-twit jokes. (Haw-haw! What will Master think!) .Anyway, for us who are more prosaically born and raised, this book offers no reward other than insight into the childhood of a frivolous (if Oxonian) class of recently and soon to be dead English aristocracy.

Gods Behaving Badly by Marie Phillips.

So you have just seen Mamma Mia (you haven’t?- well I did with a back row chorus of soul sisters whooping, and clapping) and you had a hallelujah moment; its the white-beach-sun-kissed Greek island holiday or a divorce. Now that’s settled what are you going to read. You’ll want something raunchy, frothy, funny and light with a smidgeon of culture- and that’s what you get from Gods Behaving Badly by Marie Phillips.

The snobs will sneer that Aristopaneous did it so much better and raunchier in the original Greek darling. You can counter by saying GBB is Deus ex machina to its core. And the killer put down is…can you hold the book in one hand and keep the story focused after the fifth chilled Mytilenian Ouzo? You can when the hardback is only 277 pages with big print.

The story is the gods of Olympus are alive and well in the twenty-first century, but crammed together in a London pile, broke and with ever declining powers. They do have day jobs: Artemis as a dog-walker, Apollo as a TV psychic wannabe, Aphrodite as a phone sex operator, Dionysus as a DJ and so on. Do you geedit! In keeping with the Olympic modus operandi, the gods squabble and use humans (OCD cleaner Alice and wet Engineer Neil) as their playthings. Soon the petty fight becomes a struggle for the survival of humankind. To save the world these two decidedly ordinary people have to become mythical heroes-can they!

The book’s prose is fluffy rather then tripping the light fantastic and could flag in the middle except that’s the bit where the writing got interesting for me. And my raunchy is your seedy and vulgar. So you pays your money and takes you choice.

Here’s a final thought for you as you sizzle in the sun, reading this afternoon beach-read, what sort of world would it be if the Olympic shenanigans were true: the gods did make the Moon and Sun move, we were the playthings of Fate and Christianity was a man made mistake. Hmm, best to turn over and sink the next glass, afterall you are on holiday.

The Pirates! in an adventure with Whaling by Gideon Defoe

The Pirates! in an adventure with Whaling(or with Ahab if American) draws it humour from slapstick, Monty Python, Carry on and Blackadder. Its not for children, as much of the humour relies on an adult appreciation of cliché and irony, though children may well enjoy it. This one is one long mickey take on Moby Dick.

When they are not belting out a lusty sea shanty or arguing about the best way to prepare ham, there's nothing pirates like more than a rousing adventure. And this is what the Pirate Captain, (the best leader in the Pirate world because of his beard and rugged good looks but not the sharpest cutlass in the armoury) and his shipful of variously named pirates--the scarf-wearing pirate, the pirate with an accordion, are going to get.

It also only 180ish pages long in a hand size paperback so its not going to be a heavy read. Highly recommended second of series and according to Aardman Animations website, author Gideon Defoe is working with producer/director Peter Lord on the screenplay and with writers Andy Riley and Kevin Cecil Hyperdrive (TV series) to turn the first two books from the series into a movie.

What others say about the book.If you have blogged about the book please free to load your link below

The Book of Erotic Failures by Peter Kinnell

Some amusing anecdotes. English bawdy humour with its roots in working class music hall. Read George Orwell's famous essay if you want to know more on this tradition of humour -http://www.george-orwell.org/The_Art_of_Donald_McGill/0.html

The pirates! : in an adventure with scientists by Gideon Defoe

The pirates! : in an adventure with scientists by Gideon Defoe has a humour based on a mix of slapstick,( pirates trying to use Jellyfish as a bouncy castle)Monty Python( pirates disguised as scientists disguised as women), Carry on( peering down on ladies missus) and Blackadder. The book is not aimed at children, as much of the humour relies on an adult appreciation of cliché and irony, though children may well enjoy it.

When they're not belting out a lusty sea shanty or arguing about the best way to prepare ham, there's nothing pirates like more than a rousing adventure. And this is what the Pirate Captain, (the best leader in the Pirate world because of his beard and rugged good lookss but perhaps not the sharpest cutlass in the armoury) and his shipful of variously named pirates--the scarf-wearing pirate, the pirate with an accordion, the ill-fated balding archaeologist pirate are going get.

They are tricked by the dastardly Black Bellamy into scuttling the Beagle and so stop Charles Darwin from bringing a manpanzee back to defeat his evil rival the Bishop of Oxford. To make good their mistake the pirates decide to help further the cause of science, getting treasure and peering at girls from above and go to London where with a very loose historical accuracy the Pirates struggle to solve the mystery of the Circus Ladies nights.

It also only 130ish pages long in a hand size hardback so its not going to be a heavy long term read. Highly recommended first of series and according to Aardman Animations website, author Gideon Defoe is working with producer/director Peter Lord on the screenplay and with writers Andy Riley and Kevin Cecil Hyperdrive (TV series) to turn the first two books from the series into a movie.

Slabrat by Ted Heller

Slabrat by Ted Heller is wicked satire of office politics is based on his experience of work at magazines such as Vanity Fair. The title is a slang term for high rise office workers, Think 9-5 with Dolly Parton or the Devil wears Pravda if you want to place its genre. The novel plots all the insane office status power politics and then some you have ever experienced

It follows the life of Zach an associate editor who is stalled at the stage in his career of either rising or falling. His best friend is falling and his work colleague has just lifted off. The problem is that he is lazy and wont do the brown nosing needed to get ahead apart from sleeping with what ever boss (female) he can. He is also a complete fake- not a Harvard rich kid but someone from the sticks. In the superficial world of IT this is a death warrant should it come out.

A new associate editor arrives who soon starts working the system and raises so causing panic. They start fight back with all the underhand tricks you can imagine. At the same time his love life is torn between lust, love and ambition and three different women.

Its fall of comic moments and a character list of truly appalling people that you feel must be based on real characters and you hope they read the book. Don’t expect the ending you may think but it’s the one Zach would have wanted.

Strongly recommended as a wonderful dark and oh so true depiction of office politics at its worse and describes what you would like to do…come on admit it you would.

Money by Martin Amis

This is a novel written in the early 80’s and is one long monologue about money and what chasing money, having money( and not having money) does to John Self the central character. He is a successful Ad director but at heart a fast talking East end boozing womaniser addicted to fast food and porno. And if you still like him, he beats up women, tends to be a racist, and hates gays… and horror of horror smokes. But he does have a turbulent broth of family relationships to deal with!

This could be an echo of real life as Martin Amis had a troubled relationship with his father Kingsley Amis. Who incidentally was critical of the device of having the author as a character in the story which allows Martin to take some sly digs at the pretensions of writers and writing.

John Self meets a producer in New York and spins him a story based on his own life (drunkard father, two timing mother, time waster son) and is then embroiled in the nightmare of putting the money, script and casting together. He lurches between New York and London loving money and suffering from excesses of drink, food and sex and looses girlfriend, friends and family along the way in a glorious buffoon way.

As he tries to deal with actor’s egos, money men demands and scripts he is also hounded by a stalker . Or is he? We can only understand what john understands and as he is drinking several bottles of whiskies on week long benders he is a little hazy some times on the details. During the story we get to find out what the truth of his rise to the Money as well as family secrets and who cheats who.

As the novel is set up to be a long suicide note you can sense the depths of his pain. So is this a gloomy, slash your wrist Leonard Cohen fun feast? No it’s a very funny and savage satire on money, money and money and oh the film industry. Normally, I dislike first person novels but I strongly recommended this one.

The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov

Don't you find that books are like lovers? Some you can’t bear to be parted from, wanting to spend every spare moment in each others arms, share intimate secrets as the relationship deepens so you are changed but heartbroken when the relationship has to end and you both go your separate ways. Yet with others, after the initial excitement of the first date and the promise of the pages to come, it fades, you find excuses not to read, when you do its for less and less time, you get distracted by other books and even start to two-time by skimming them, trying to convince yourself its only a fun no strings fling.

Sadly this is happening with The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov. It had all the signs of the great read; political satire, Gothic appearances and interventions by the Devil, suppressed by the Soviets, but... but I have faded starting dalliances with other books such as The life and times of the Thunderbolt Kid by Bill Bryson.Why the fading relationship? Well the usual thing is to say its me not you, I am not ready for commitment, let’s be friends rather then face the pain of saying you are not lovable by me. The killer, as in all relationships, is the minor fault that reveals deeper flaws. For me this is the idiom and speech patterns feeling false. I find it difficult to suspend believe and become part of the world so it remains intellectually satisfying but an emotional famine.

The book was written over the 20's and 30's at the height of the worse excesses of Stalin and would have cost the writer his life had it been found at the time. It’s a period of history I have had a great deal of interest in so it’s even more disappointing that the book feels flat. Its very urban based and concerned with the cultural politics of the intelligentsia but the great disasters of the period, the destruction of the rural classes, wiping out of the party, the show trails, mass imprisonments are barely touched on Perhaps the problem is past relations with other Russians such as Solzhenitsyn who deal with similar themes but with greater distinction. Perhaps because I looking for something that the novel does not have, I am missing what it does offer. Friends of the novel say

Ultimately, the novel deals with the interplay of good and evil, innocence and guilt, courage and cowardice, exploring such issues as the responsibility towards truth when authority would deny it, and the freedom of the spirit in an unfree world. Love and sensuality are also dominant themes in the novel. The novel is a riot of sensual impressions, but the emptiness of sensual gratification without love is emphatically illustrated in the satirical passages

For now, I have decided to not spend more time with my family and stop at Book 2. So am I on a break or is this the end for us? Only time will tell but always more books in the library that I can cherish and love... And dear reader, my spurned lover could be the passion of your life so make a date and enjoy the bitch about the failures of ex’s if the relationship works out.